On The Road Again

Here it is early morning, and I’m propped up in bed writing you.  This is usually what happens … these notes come up and just want to be written down and shared with you.  It’s a mystery as to who is writing this and to whom and who is there to receive them.  But, here it goes anyway.

As I woke up, it all started with this little tune singing in my head … “On the road again” … then came a memory of Ramana singing this, as we headed out together in the new motor home.  It was about 20 years ago.  We had just gotten this 32-foot motor home and we had my car in tow.  It was the first time going out in this big rig and Ramana was going to take it out onto the highway and then hand it over to me.  I was very nervous about handling it by myself and he was very supportive in giving me this opportunity to get used to it before going on my own.  This was the time that I had been travelling quite a bit, giving talks and workshops throughout the southeast.   I started with my car, then moved up to a small RV and then moved up to the large rig to accommodate longer times out and a larger storage for books etc.

These are sweet memories of days gone by, that were filled with so much richness.  The thirty-two years with Ramana was much like what happened with this new experience with the motor home.  It was all uncharted territory for me when I met him … the spiritual discovery was just beginning.  He was a very supportive guide.  One that was always there in the sidelines and yet gave me the space to discover, on my own, what was the best route to take.  There were many times that I just wanted him to take over the reigns because it was so unfamiliar to me and pretty scary.  There was so much relying on it.  And, he insisted, “If I did it for you, now, then you wouldn’t have the opportunity to discover it for yourself, would you?”  This was so wise and has proved to be true.

Over this past ten months, here in this lovely space by the sea, I have had an opportunity to see the treasures that were so fully being given during this 32-year relationship with my teacher, Ramana.  This time of “stop” has not only nurtured this body and given back its sound health, but it has given me this opportunity of seeing as well.  This 32-year period was very similar to one of those fast trains you would see in Europe … much like a bullet that you can hardly see when it goes by.  Over this time period, the “train” slowed down to a stop and all that was discovered over this time with Ramana, was being fully seen.  What a treasure!   All of it!

Now, this apparent movement is beginning to take me in another direction.  One that is away from this place and “on the road again.”  There is no hesitancy to allowing this movement to take me wherever IT wants to take me.  The surrender into the Current is complete.  Truthfully, the body is moving but, actually, it doesn’t feel like I’m going anywhere.

Another scene is coming up, from days gone by … Ramana and I are driving down the highway.  He’s in the driver’s seat (he loved to drive) and he said to me, “It looks like we’re driving somewhere, doesn’t it? Look at the road ahead.  Isn’t it coming to us?  And, are we not just sitting here, not moving, in this car?  Are we moving, really?  It just looks that way, but what is the truth about it?”

It’s all coming into view and making perfect sense.

Thank you, Ramana.  You have made your mark … the Light of Truth has been passed on … the message is clear ...

“Simply stay in the Higher Awareness.  You can do that.  Now, that you have the “means” and “the way” to do that, it’s entirely up to you.  It’s your responsibility to do that.  You can’t put the blame on anyone or anything outside of yourself, because there is no one outside of yourself!  You can’t even see anyone unless there is an “I” to see him or her.  And, that “I” that is seeing “them” cannot even see without the prior Awareness – the true Self – out of which it takes rise.  So, there is no “other.”  The notion of a separate “I” is itself entirely conceptual!  In truth, it does not exist!

We are all this Pure Awareness of Being – that’s who we have always been – but we have been indulging in the conditioned patterns of the conditioned “sub conscious mind, or “inner child of the past,” and with it and the conscious mind we’ve been meditating this separate-self-identity, by indulging in this contrived ego notion, this perpetual  “I-me-my-mine” mantra, and further reinforcing this limitation of “I-me-my-mine” and evidently “getting off to it” in a very sick way. 

Just get this!  See it by simply “seeing” it – not as an “I” seeing it – but pure Seeing Itself seeing it.  

See it and be Happy!”

Namasté

  

Heart's Symphony

When I am with you…what I really enjoy is not you; it’s something that’s greater than both you and me.  It is something that I discovered, a kind of symphony, a kind of orchestra that plays one melody in your presence, but when you depart, the orchestra doesn’t stop.  When I meet someone else, it plays another melody, which is also very delightful.  And, when I’m alone, it continues to play.  There’s a great repertoire and it never ceases to play.

–      “Awareness” by Anthony DeMello

There have been many gifts of insight while travelling and moving from place and meeting old friends again, or meeting new ones.  I have begun to realize this Heart symphony that Anthony DeMello is speaking about here.  He has such a beautiful way of putting it. 

This subtle “Heart Symphony” isn’t really a sound at all, is it?  It’s no sound, yet it feels full and complete, with a sense of all is well just as it is.   In a good symphony, the collective sounds do seem to come together in harmony and in unison as one sound, don’t they?

Where are we coming from while relationship happens?  Telling the truth about it …   Am I in and as That Which is Seeing what is being experienced while I’m in relationship?  Or, am I getting caught up in the experience, whether pleasant or unpleasant; either shutting down or trying to direct it in some way?  This can show up in many ways.

Relationship seems to be where “the rubber meets the road” and shows us exactly where we are.  Do we just have an intellectual understanding about Truth and how it all works?  Or, are we applying what we have come to understand? 

Anthony continues to say …

The three most difficult things for a human being are not physical feats or intellectual achievements.  They are, first, returning love for hate; second, including the excluded; third, admitting that you are wrong.” … But, these are the easiest things in the world if you haven’t identified with the “me.”

This “me” tends to get caught up and involved in what is coming and going in our life … wanting it to be this way and not wanting it to be that way.  Or, just excludes the person all together through a sense of wrong or even hate by disliking somebody or something intensely, ourselves included. 

So, Anthony’s “difficult things” can be areas of transformation in our lives as we shift out of the “me” through opening to our Heart’s Symphony.  Then, this transformation comes natural … returning love for hate … including the excluded … admitting that I am wrong.

It all comes down to one thing…are we honoring and living from this Truth?

We are the giver of existence to the whole world.

- Bhagavan Ramana

Living this truth, there is only one here and we are that.  Now, we can just be the Seeing and simply enjoy the Heart’s Symphony … a perfect melody from here.

Another gift from the Sea ...

I Am That Nothing

We walk on the land.

The land floats on the water.

The water rests in the bowl of the earth.

The bowl of the earth floats on the ocean of the cosmos.

The ocean of the cosmos rests in the bowl of time.

The bowl of time rides on the back of the elephant of eternity.

The elephant of eternity stands on the back of the boundless turtle of being.

The boundless turtle of being stands on nothing.

I am that nothing.

- A Zen Poem

This picture was taken this morning at Flagler Beach, here in Florida.  This is one of the baby loggerhead turtles that emerged from it's nest.   It instinctively knows to head for the ocean and swim to a north bound current, which is a three day journey out into the ocean.  This current takes the baby turtle up the east coast, over to Europe, down the coast of Africa and eventually ends it's five to seven year journey in the Carribean.  Here it will grow to full size and at about 23 years old, it instinctively heads back up the current to the place it was born.  The female turtle will then lay her eggs at the exact place she was born.

I had adopted a turtle nest while here, but missed the emergence, so this was the first time I had been able to capture this delightful moment and watch a hatchling, no bigger than the palm of your hand, waddle feverishly through the sand onto the seashore and eventually swim through the surf.  WOW!  What an opportunity to directly experience nature at its finest.  This was such an awesome gift of wisdom, I wanted to share it with you.

This Zen poem was gifted to me, as well, as I sat down to write to you.  I just opened one of my books and here it was...

The elephant of eternity stands on the back of the boundless turtle of being.

The boundless turtle of being stands on nothing.

As this baby turtle swam out to meet the current, it came to me how there was nothing to stand on but  instinct or intuition to swim toward this current, and then to surrender completely into it and let it take her.  Having reached the current, this will be the first time to relax and eat since hatching three days earlier.  Nothing was more important and everything was relying on this nothing.

This reminded me of what Bhagavan Ramana said about following our "unerring intuition" and, letting go into the "I-Current" in every moment of now.  Haven't we seen how this Current will guide us entirely, step by step, in life itself?  

An investigative question comes up to check-in with... "Are we tuned into this unerring intuition and following this I-Current with the same faith and trust that this little being is?"  Or, is there still a tendency to try to work it out myself and not fully letting go into this Current with the same total faith and trust that is being demonstrated here?   Having nothing to stand on but Being itself.

We can have the understanding of Truth and even know how it works.  Yet, unless we have applied the truth in our life, in daily situations, what do we really have? 

We walk on the land.

The land floats on the water.

The water rests in the bowl of the earth.

The bowl of the earth floats on the ocean of the cosmos.

The ocean of the cosmos rests in the bowl of time.

The bowl of time rides on the back of the elephant of eternity.

The elephant of eternity stands on the back of the boundless turtle of being.

The boundless turtle of being stands on nothing.

I am that nothing.

Yes, "I am (we are) that nothing."  

As we tune into this marvelous example in nature, we can see that this "nothing" is the basis of everything and IT has a wisdom and intelligence that is absolutely awesome and beyond the thinking mind.  The gift from our baby turtle is ... don't think about it ... instead, if we follow our natural instincts, our unerring intuition, we will then take what comes as our first response in what is arising and have the courage, faith and trust to follow IT step by step, letting the Current take us all the way home...back to where we originally came from. 

This morning, as I followed this little one on his first journey to the sea, I was totally inspired by its one pointed attention and courage to go into uncharted territory with nothing to hold onto accept what was guiding him from within.  How much do we rely on something outside of us to guide us or even make our decisions?  It all comes down to our relying on total and complete IN-dependence, doesn't it?

Good to be with you again and have this opportunity to share another gift from the sea.

Thank You, Mother Ocean

I accept you

altogether

like the Ocean

accepts the fish

that swim in it.

It is no good 

apologizing

for anything

you have done.

For you have been

nowhere yet

nor done anything

that I have not supported you.

The first time this was shared with me, years ago, I was just beginning my spiritual journey and was overwhelmed with seeing aspects of my self that had been hidden from view for a long time.  Seeing for the first time can be very painful and difficult to accept.  Over time, many layers were seen through and accepted.  And, these loving words from my teacher, proved to be true. 

Exploring into this message more deeply now, a new meaning has come into view.

Over the past eight months, I have lived close to the Ocean and many gifts have been freely given from her Grace-full presence.  A depth of seeing had been covered over by a misperception about serving.

My whole life has been one of finding myself in places where I could give service to assist in some way.   And, there appeared to be a number of areas where I could be useful and even see improvement happening in my life and in those around me.  I realize now, in looking back, it was coming from the premise that if I could just make it right, bring it all back together again, make it all work...whatever "it" is... then my life would be useful in some way.  I would have fulfilled my lifelong purpose...the destiny for which I was born to fulfill.

In a flash of insight, it was being seen that trying to make it better in any way is futile.  The nature of this world is separation and no matter how much we do to make it work, it's nature is "right and wrong," "good and evil," "up and down," "pleasure and pain."  There is nothing I can do to make it any different than what it is.  1 + 1 = 2 ... not 1. It will never ever come together as one, no matter what I do or not do. And, this constant "doing" or "trying to fix-it" was keeping me from fully accepting it all as it is. 

"I accept you, altogether" ... this acceptance is the embrace of what's always, already true ... the realization that who I am (we are) is already whole and complete just as it is.  Nothing needs to be fixed from here.  

You can relax now,

come on and open your eyes,

breathe deeply now

I am with you.

Oh, my sweet, sweet child

who do you think you are?

You are a child of God.

And, that will never change.

You had a dream.

You misunderstood.

You thought we were separate.

But, now, you hear My Voice.

You can relax now.

AHA!   There is an appearance of separation in the world.  That is its nature.  And, yes, from the world's perspective it is painful.  But, now I see how it all fits ... there has never been a separation from Being.  Relaxing into Being...into that which is seeing all of what is happening in the world around me...this is true freedom.  Now,  from this wholeness and fullness of completion, maybe there is something that can be offered to support my world.  We will see what comes, naturally, in the moment.

In the meantime, there is a relaxation and a simple enjoyment  in what is, as it is.

Thank you Mother Ocean.

Feels so good to be sharing with you this way once again.  Please feel free to share your comments and insights too...we will all benefit from these awakenings.

Sending you a HUGE hug.